本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛CANADIAN JOKE #1
An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie. He went to the neurosurgeon and asked "Is there anything you can do to me that would make me into a Newfie?" "Sure it's easy." replied the neurosurgeon. "All I have to do is cut 1/3 of your brain, and you'll be a Newfie." The Ontarian was very pleased, and immediately underwent the operation.
However, the neurosurgeon's knife slipped, and instead of cutting 1/3 of the patient's brain, the surgeon accidently cut out 2/3 of the patient's brain. He was terribly remorseful, and waited impatiently beside the bed as the patient recovered from the anesthetic. As soon as the patient was conscious, the neurosurgeon said to him "I'm terribly sorry but there was a ghastly accident. Instead of cutting out 1/3 of your brain, I accidentally cut out 2/3 of your brain."
The patient replied "Qu'est-ce que vous avez dit,monsieur?"
CANADIAN JOKE #2
Did you hear about the war between Newfoundland and Nova Scotia?
The Newfies were lobbing hand grenades; the Nova Scotians were pulling the pins and throwing them back.
CANADIAN JOKE #3
A Quebecer, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper. "Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge.
"Toilette pepper!" yelled the Quebecer.
CANADIAN JOKE #4
On the first day of Grade 3, Johnnie's teacher asked the students to count to 50. Many of them did very well, some getting as high as 37. But Johnnie did extremely well, he made it to 100 with only 3 mistakes. At home he told his dad how well he had done. Dad told him, "That's because you are from Newfoundland, son."
The next day, in language class, the teacher asked students to recite the alphabet. Some made it to the letter "k" with only one mistake, but Johnnie out did them again. He made it all the way through, missing only the letter "m". That evening he once again brought his dad up to date nd dad explained to him, "That's because you are from ewfoundland, son."
The next day, after Physical Education, the boys were taking
showers. Johnnie noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade, he seemed overly "well-endowed". This confused him. That night, he asked his dad, "Dad, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than theirs. Is that because I'm from Newfoundland?" "No, son," explained dad, That's because you're 18."
CANADIAN JOKE #5
Latest news reports advise that a cell of 4 terrorists has been operating in Newfoundland, Canada. Police advised earlier today that 3 of the 4 have been detained. The Newfoundland Provincial Police Commissioner stated that the terrorists Bin Sleepin, Bin Drinkin and Bin Fightin have been arrested on immigration issues.
The Police advise further that they can find no one fitting the description of the fourth cell member, Bin Workin, in the province. Police are confident that anyone who looks like Workin will be very easy to spot in the community.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie. He went to the neurosurgeon and asked "Is there anything you can do to me that would make me into a Newfie?" "Sure it's easy." replied the neurosurgeon. "All I have to do is cut 1/3 of your brain, and you'll be a Newfie." The Ontarian was very pleased, and immediately underwent the operation.
However, the neurosurgeon's knife slipped, and instead of cutting 1/3 of the patient's brain, the surgeon accidently cut out 2/3 of the patient's brain. He was terribly remorseful, and waited impatiently beside the bed as the patient recovered from the anesthetic. As soon as the patient was conscious, the neurosurgeon said to him "I'm terribly sorry but there was a ghastly accident. Instead of cutting out 1/3 of your brain, I accidentally cut out 2/3 of your brain."
The patient replied "Qu'est-ce que vous avez dit,monsieur?"
CANADIAN JOKE #2
Did you hear about the war between Newfoundland and Nova Scotia?
The Newfies were lobbing hand grenades; the Nova Scotians were pulling the pins and throwing them back.
CANADIAN JOKE #3
A Quebecer, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper. "Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge.
"Toilette pepper!" yelled the Quebecer.
CANADIAN JOKE #4
On the first day of Grade 3, Johnnie's teacher asked the students to count to 50. Many of them did very well, some getting as high as 37. But Johnnie did extremely well, he made it to 100 with only 3 mistakes. At home he told his dad how well he had done. Dad told him, "That's because you are from Newfoundland, son."
The next day, in language class, the teacher asked students to recite the alphabet. Some made it to the letter "k" with only one mistake, but Johnnie out did them again. He made it all the way through, missing only the letter "m". That evening he once again brought his dad up to date nd dad explained to him, "That's because you are from ewfoundland, son."
The next day, after Physical Education, the boys were taking
showers. Johnnie noted that, compared to the other boys in his grade, he seemed overly "well-endowed". This confused him. That night, he asked his dad, "Dad, they all have little tiny ones, but mine is ten times bigger than theirs. Is that because I'm from Newfoundland?" "No, son," explained dad, That's because you're 18."
CANADIAN JOKE #5
Latest news reports advise that a cell of 4 terrorists has been operating in Newfoundland, Canada. Police advised earlier today that 3 of the 4 have been detained. The Newfoundland Provincial Police Commissioner stated that the terrorists Bin Sleepin, Bin Drinkin and Bin Fightin have been arrested on immigration issues.
The Police advise further that they can find no one fitting the description of the fourth cell member, Bin Workin, in the province. Police are confident that anyone who looks like Workin will be very easy to spot in the community.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net