Everyone is ordinary. I think even president of America. But when you love him, he is your sun. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶) @安省华人论坛:安省枫下论坛 The Rolia Forum of Ontario

枫下佳缘 / 情爱悠悠 / 看到楼下的美眉问“爱上有妇之夫怎么办？”，挖个坑，“爱上一个离婚的男人真是寂寞呀。” -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {466} (#3885869@0)
一个人不寂寞，想一个人才寂寞。他有3个孩子，父母，姐妹都在。好多家庭事务，今天孩子踢足球，明天他要和朋友一起玩音乐。见他几乎要预约。一个星期只见1，2次。其实一点也不介意和他的孩子一起看他享受天伦之乐，可是不能我总是去他家吧。

好象我是多余的。他的生活是不是已经完整了？

我觉得好寂寞，觉得自己像个拖油瓶，总是跟在他人的身后, 假日，周末，总想有个去处。
他的爱给的不够，我要的比他能给的多。

早知道还是不要爱的好，本来可以好好享受一下生活，谁知爱了比不爱更寂寞。

hoho, very interesting -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-22 (#3885884@0)
他不需要你. 找个需要你的. -summer07(bsta); 2007-8-22 (#3885889@0)
does it worth it? all these trouble.... -pingaling(Doraemon); 2007-8-22 (#3885899@0)

不值得这样寂寞。可是他有着让我心动的笑容，温柔的让我沉醉，我的心在他的注视下像花一样缓缓的开放。。。走过了这么久才遇见一个这样的人，怎么会舍得放弃。。。 -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3885913@0)

我以前有个室友说过 -- 男的爱上女的会变傻, 其实女的爱上男的会变更傻 -- 唉, 说得一点不错. -dusk(~小桥流水~); 2007-8-22 (#3885942@0)
哎，女人啊.. ... -pingaling(Doraemon); 2007-8-22 (#3885999@0)
I don't think he is the one responsible for your 寂寞, and actually I think you are the one having produced your own 寂寞. You might just focus a bit too much on this man, and you might have already lost some of yourself. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 {232} (#3886001@0)
He is divorced with 3 children as well as a job, so that he has lots of other duties and responsibilities to fulfil as well.

If you love him, try to help him out instead of solely immersing yourself into theoretical love scenes.

You are absolutely right, I feel lonely because last night I figured that I have to accommodate his schedule in order to see him. I response for my own happiness and loneliness. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {104} (#3886036@0)
But I am afraid I will give up eventually because I feel it is not enough for me and I don't want to...

Accommodating his schedule once or twice is OK, but doing it all the time is wrong. He needs to accomodate some of your schedules as well. Learn how to say no to him, and wait and see his response. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886053@0)

别急，一会儿就过去了。 -roshi(如是我闻); 2007-8-23 (#3887308@0)

. -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-22 {90} (#3885914@0)
I guess..... "is worth it" instead of "does worth it" ... a little strange, isn't it?

同意呀：） -mine888(蔡顺); 2007-8-22 (#3885901@0)
橘子对你的批示如下： -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-22 {12} (#3885920@0)
太贱~~~~:)))

comments -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {93} (#3885931@0)
You are surprised me, I thought you are a nice lady but actually you are really a mean bitch!

怎么出口伤人？又看了你的故事，发现你实在太可怜，也就不和你一般见识了。。。 -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 (#3887156@0)

一句话，他不爱你。如果他真爱你，你是绝对不需要预约的。 -linklist(小娥); 2007-8-22 (#3885934@0)

也不算是预约，但是我总要适应他的行程，他是这样的忙。 -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {274} (#3885954@0)
周一，男孩踢球，周二，他和朋友玩音乐，周三，他女儿踢球，周四，和歌手联系，周五，见我，周六，带孩子去见父母，周日，休息，

我的行程就变成：
周一，看男孩踢球，周二，不祥，周三，我上跳舞课，周四，不祥，周五，取消我的行程去见他，周六，不祥，周日，不祥。

真是寂寞呀！

他玩甚么音乐啊, 摇滚二胡吗 ? 请问 ……….. : ) -playkipp(Kipp); 2007-8-22 (#3885960@0)

african drum -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3885963@0)

Have you ever tried one of his hobbies? Have you ever drummed together with him? Guys don't like to just sit down and talk or feel about love, and they like to DO things with their beloved ones. Try to involve yourself into his activities. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3885974@0)

To rosegarden: agreed #3885974. You may try to create a topic -- 最完整的摇滚africa drum or 二胡全收录..... : ) -playkipp(Kipp); 2007-8-22 (#3885983@0)

:))))))) Can you please help LZ in this aspect? -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3885987@0)

I dance. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3885994@0)

Great! Could you dance with the africa drum ? If yes, that would be a perfect matching! : ) -playkipp(Kipp); 2007-8-22 (#3886004@0)

Great great idea. :))))))) -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886010@0)
I think I could, but if he drums with his friends, it is a little bit weird to dance in front of them. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886098@0)

Hi, sister, be flexible. You can ask him to teach you how to drum, and you can dance while he is drumming in privacy not specifically in front of his friends. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886164@0)

I like that one, but just like to listen from far far away. -roshi(如是我闻); 2007-8-23 (#3887314@0)

看不出有多忙. 要真爱你, 很多时间可以选择和你一起的. 放弃幻想吧. -dusk(~小桥流水~); 2007-8-22 (#3886003@0)
两个人相处，双方都需要做些调整。但我只看到你随着他的节奏在跳舞，没有看到他的让步。他有过去和不算简单的家庭，你要和她有未来就必须得到他的全力支持，而我看不出他会全力支持你。还有一点，男人喜欢挑战和刺激，所以，有些时候，不要太迁就他，从而让他看轻你了。 -linklist(小娥); 2007-8-22 (#3886014@0)
说句你不爱听得话，你象是他的专职免费应召啊，不放手还等到什麽时候？现在的女孩子都这麽好骗吗？ -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3886015@0)

也不是这样好骗的，你骗给我看看。 -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886045@0)

:)))))))))))))))))) Good girl. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886070@0)
咱连周末都没空，骗来干什麽？你就没有自己的生活吗？ -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3886078@0)

Not necessarily true, though. LZ is only part of his life, and he is a guy with a history. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3885984@0)

This is that I am afraid of. A man with lots of history is the obstacle to the happiness -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886002@0)

Not necessarily true, though. It depends on what kind of history different individuals have. I don't see any negativity in your boyfriend's history. In my opinion, he is awesome with a very positive attitude toward life and family. He is a great guy. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886017@0)

Thank you, you are wonderful person too. I can see your advices make a lot sense to me. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886050@0)

Talk to him, and find out your expectations of the relationship. If your expectations are too different, you may need to let it go. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3885966@0)

昨晚，我对他说我觉得和他在一起的时间太少，我要仔细在他的时刻表中找到可以给我的时间。我觉得很心酸，他觉得我这样说很可爱。 -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {206} (#3885993@0)
我真的能体会他的苦衷，他是个父亲要照顾孩子，他是个男人要有自己的爱好朋友，他要谋生，有压力。他这样的忙也是情有可原的，可是我是这样的寂寞，时时盼着见到他。我好担心他只能给我这么多，而这么多对我而言是不够的。

可怜的女人.... -pingaling(Doraemon); 2007-8-22 (#3886018@0)
Ask him if you can make the schedule with him. Meanwhile, you need to have more friends and activities or hobbies of your own to enrich your own life. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886031@0)

I did have lots of schedule till he told me we are in a relationship. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {245} (#3886065@0)
I thought I should be more faithful and not seeing my ex anymore. Btw, my ex like my family, we broke up 2 years ago and remain like family, holiday, weekend I go visit his family. Then I got left behind now because I have no family here anymore

Being loyal and faithful has no problem with being sociable and active, right? Besides your current boyfriend and your ex, you got to get more friends around yourself, sister. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886081@0)

"好象我是多余的",错，你在他的生活中占有一定的地位，当他无聊时，当他有需求时。你好像连他的女朋友都算不上，真可怜！！！单恋的人就象飞蛾！！！ -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3885988@0)

单恋? Oh, no, you got this wrong. We are in the relationship. This is open to public. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886012@0)

你只是他现有生活的补充或者说是调剂，你想要得是完全的生活，他如果爱你，不会只给你一天的时间，周末情人吗？ -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3886039@0)

same question here. -summer07(bsta); 2007-8-22 (#3886062@0)

I don't know if you are divorced with children as well. But based on your description, I feel you have a much simpler life style and life experiences. There might be a gap there. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886044@0)

so true, I never married, I have no kids, I only date guys at my age, so life is very simple for me and my past. I have good job, and attractive appearance, everything to me is easy and simple. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 {344} (#3886079@0)
I was so happy that I finally found someone that I want to spend the rest of my life, then after few months, I started to hesitate about my relationship because of the gap we had. He has a full circle which is only missing a small angle (relationship). But I am a full circle missing a big angle, I want him be the big angle to fulfill my life.

Be careful, then. This man might like you for your simplicity and innocence, but he might also feel a bit disappointed at your lack of life experiences. Try to improve yourself, but don't lose yourself. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886087@0)
it is impossible to change his life,do you want to be his one day wife in a week? -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3886095@0)

你通常是电话预约?还是上网预约? :D -peeler(逛街的西瓜); 2007-8-22 (#3886046@0)

He comes by see me everyday just say hi. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886084@0)

your post tells that you won't get what you've been looking for, you are just a part of his life, have lower priority than his kids, do sth before its too late, either win his heart or leave his sight -peeler(逛街的西瓜); 2007-8-22 (#3886093@0)

His kids are important than me. I did win his heart, but then you can't compare apple to orange. It is not me or kids, he can only have one choice. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886112@0)

you are being ignored lady, being ignored, well, if thats what you've been looking for, go for it. -peeler(逛街的西瓜); 2007-8-22 (#3886121@0)
No, he can have TWO choices, which means he can have both his kids and you in his life, if you know how to balance the relationship by NOT sacrificing too much of yourself to this man. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886138@0)

Actually he may not like your mechanical faithfulness or loyalty, and perhaps he may feel bored by the fact that you have nobody else but himself to depend on for friendship and social life. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 {68} (#3886144@0)
He may also feel you are like a burden instead of a joy in his life.

I feel like I am walking toward to that direction which I should not. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 (#3887150@0)

I think besides love, you kind of admire him as well, but remember that he is not the SUN, and you are NOT the MOON. While he is doing his activities, you can go out socializing yourself as well. You have a life, -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 {62} (#3886075@0)
and you are more than just his girlfriend.

Enjoy your life.

I do admire him as man, a loving father of his kids. Most of my friends are male, I backed off for him because I thought I should be more faithful. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-22 (#3886094@0)

So in your opinion, being faithful means cutting friends, specifically male friends, out of your life? Why your boyfriend does not cut his kids, friends or African drums out of his life? -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 {77} (#3886134@0)
Because he knows being faithful doesn't mean you have to sacrifice yourself.

总有个人要放弃点什么，如果都忙，那有时间培养感情？并不是说她就必须放弃，但是如果她的时间要多一点，自然就会不那么在乎了。 -mine888(蔡顺); 2007-8-22 (#3886149@0)

LZ might just have given up too much. It's not about whether she should give up or not, but about how to make the balance. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886173@0)

There has something about me which is hard to describer. I saw few male friends on regular base before, it was not about love or dating, even though I knew they liked me. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 {436} (#3887174@0)
For some reason, I didn't feel the connection between me and my male friends, we have mutual understanding on this. I feel akward to seeing them while I am in a relationship, it make me feel guilty and feel that I am taking advantage of them. I absolutely agree with ASKER(amore), because I don't know how to balance this, and I backed off, and I feel so demanding now. I knew I should be who I am, but I get lost in the relationship.

非常理解。 -mine888(蔡顺); 2007-8-23 (#3887246@0)
Perhaps you shouldn't have backed off, and perhaps your current boyfriend doesn't want you to back off. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888200@0)

我觉得最主要还是看这个男的有多用心了。我怎么突然觉得女人很多时候都是在自己跟自己谈恋爱，沉浸在自己勾画出来的画面，故事里。只愿意相信自己想要相信的。 -pingaling(Doraemon); 2007-8-22 (#3886141@0)

Kind of agree with you. -asker(amour); 2007-8-22 (#3886186@0)
同意，有道理 -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3886187@0)
correct! seems she is in love but her boyfriend is not in the mood? -chu.ge(楚格, 海闊天空); 2007-8-22 (#3886213@0)

我觉得有可能是爱上了一种假象 -pingaling(Doraemon); 2007-8-23 (#3886915@0)

agree. -summer07(bsta); 2007-8-22 (#3886234@0)
有同感。旁观者清，当局者迷。 -happysmile(快乐小路); 2007-8-22 {24} (#3886863@0)
咦，好像你刚刚过完生日？

没有 -pingaling(Doraemon); 2007-8-23 (#3886907@0)

嗯， -happysmile(快乐小路); 2007-8-23 {10} (#3886925@0)
聪明。。。

嗯，参见许茹芸的独角戏 -teddybear(Teddy); 2007-8-23 (#3887399@0)

妹妹你大胆地往前走哇，往前走，莫回呀头 -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-22 (#3886193@0)
是你爱错人了，所以才把自己摆在了一个多余的角色上。赶紧换人吧！ -loong(aa); 2007-8-22 (#3886198@0)
建议你即使要爱上离婚的男人,也要是个还没有过孩子的离婚的男人. -lucky2004(luckymum); 2007-8-22 (#3886217@0)
u should talk with your boyfriend about ur relationship! otherwise, u r wasting ur own time! he has 3 kids as well as many responsibilities, i guess... it is so tired to be involved in this kinda of love! sigh....... -chu.ge(楚格, 海闊天空); 2007-8-22 (#3886223@0)

He said, he is trying to make thing better and plan better, he is learning. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 (#3887429@0)

trying? that is not enough, my friend! i dont really think that a divorced man with 3 kids and many things can have real love again..... sigh..... -chu.ge(楚格, 海闊天空); 2007-8-23 (#3887485@0)

碰上高手了，认输吧。实在不甘心就撤！ -leonardmars(小马识途); 2007-8-22 (#3886290@0)
it is very simple. just move in and live with him. -the_dumb_one(dumb_and_dumber); 2007-8-22 (#3886346@0)

yeah, that is what the man want ;-) Why not marry him? -lmouse(下雨天); 2007-8-22 (#3886813@0)

understand. :-)........next time choose one who is "very single". :-) -babyface(★★ 太抒情了 ★★); 2007-8-23 (#3887233@0)
如果你条件如你所说的一样，你可以在有ex和这离婚的男人之外同时再找呀。除非 -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-23 {44} (#3887242@0)
你其他的male friends条件很差，所以你没感觉。

connection is something you can't describe. Not by look, not by income, it is about feeling, emotional compatibility. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 {472} (#3887412@0)
One of my male friend looks better than Calvin Klein underwear model, he is very single, very intellegent (IT), my age, and 6' tall, hold 4 ontario provincial swimming records at age 13, but he is not the one. My bf, 3 kids, very intellegent, 8 years older than me and 5'6'', he can drum, I think he is the one because he makes my heart singing.

If anyone were me, I think she will choose my male friend, but life is too short, I will follow what my heart tells me.

wow, 听上去象童话。为什么model还是single ? -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-23 (#3887455@0)

Why can't he be single? Of course he is single, so am I. If you think I might be old, fat and ugly, then you are so wrong. He looks better than Calvin Klein underwear model, he is a software developer. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 (#3887469@0)
This answer should give to curve, but you remind me the reason I love my bf instead of my male friend. -rosegarden(spanish harlem); 2007-8-23 {208} (#3887495@0)
My bf is like a mirror, mirror the good side of me, he is kind and hearted, and I want to be like him. My male friend, he mirrored my bad side of me, angry and cold blooded, and I don't want to be like that.

收到。你是想说你的male friend是local白人，你的boyfriend是西班牙裔？咱白帮你分析了。 -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-23 {72} (#3887528@0)
咱还以为至少有一个是同胞呢。ex呢？也是？难怪多伦多男国移让主席性欲冷漠。

你怎么会得出这样的结论？难道同胞中就没有kind and hearted？ -rosegarden(spanish harlem); 2007-8-23 (#3888006@0)

nothing to say! u r in love and nobody can pull u out now from it, hehe:) but what u need to confirm is if he has the same LOVE as u do and he wanna make a commitment for ur future life, ok? understand? :) -chu.ge(楚格, 海闊天空); 2007-8-23 (#3887477@0)

没看出来你寂寞。你有个boyfriend, 还和ex象家人一样会面，又在外面有N个male friend定期单独见面。老大，人不能太贪心了呀。我担心你时间分配不过来呢。 -highwaytoronto(假日海滩); 2007-8-23 (#3887332@0)

but not anymore because I am in the relationship, I have tons of time now. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 (#3887417@0)

妹子，送你一句话：你爱的不是他，是爱情! -roshi(如是我闻); 2007-8-23 (#3887359@0)

也许吧。。。 -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 (#3887390@0)

不是说死了都要爱么? : ) -teddybear(Teddy); 2007-8-23 (#3887395@0)
你到底爱上他啥了 -curve(curve); 2007-8-23 (#3887422@0)

when I am with him, I am a better person, a kind person. He makes my heart sing. -rosegarden(玫瑰园); 2007-8-23 (#3887441@0)

hey, then keep on loving him. It is easy to find someone rich, someone handsome, someone single. But not easy find someone you really love. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 {292} (#3887836@0)
You need time to learn how to live together, how to compromise, how to concor all the problems. As long as you have love between you and him, there won't be anything matters. Try to adjust you and also tell him about your feeling. Try to go through all the problem togethere. Wish you happy.
I understand your feeling totally. I think that's the best feeling for a woman. I don't think everyone can experience the same feeling as we do. So treasure it. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 (#3887844@0)

爱看韩剧的人都这样想，爱看married with children就选模特，选ex的爱看什么？ -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-23 (#3887897@0)

hehe, I never watch that. But I believe love. I think love is one of the most beautiful and most powerful thing in the world. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 (#3888316@0)

Thanks, you are very kind. -rosegarden(spanish harlem); 2007-8-23 (#3888007@0)
Don't get yourself into this type of illusion. For my understanding, the best feeling is supposed to lift you or LZ up, not make you or LZ feeling sad, lonely and hopeless. You or LZ deserve better than this, trust me. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888217@0)

You know one thing I understand after years of experience is, nothing is perfect in the world. The thing is you can't quit anything when it is not perfect, you need to learn how to improve and concor. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 (#3888270@0)

Yeah, speaking of career or education, you definitely can improve it, but coming to relationship or love, you can't, cause some people just can't be changed, like it or not. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888308@0)

rules apply to everything. Every one is changing and you also can change the other. Depend on how smart you are and how much you want the other change. Don't expect Rome can be build within one day. :) -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 (#3889370@0)

Perhaps you need to wait till you get married and have been staying married for 10 or 20 years, and then you may get a more correct answer to the question "Can we change our partners/spourses or not? " Good luck. :) -asker(amour); 2007-8-24 (#3890779@0)

Oh, sister, please don't give him so many credits. You must be confident that you have been a better person long before you met him. The more credits you give him, the less confidence you have in yourself. Guys like confident gals. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 {183} (#3888208@0)
I think deepdown he might look down upon you somehow, cause you take him as the Sun, and yourself as the Moon, but actually he is NOT THE SUN, and he is just a regular ordinary guy.

Everyone is ordinary. I think even president of America. But when you love him, he is your sun. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 {735} (#3888312@0)
I think everyone deserves to have their own space even when they have someone they love. That means even LZ loves him and he loves LZ, he still should not scarify all the other things and just stay with LZ. Do you think that is fair for his kids, his sisters or the other people he also loves and loves him if he spends all his time just with the girl he loves. Love should not be that selfish. And what I feel is only when he treats others nice, he can also treat you nice in the future. The very important thing is you need to have your own space so you won’t rely on him too much. Otherwise, he will feel your love is too much burden for him. If you are really not that happy, talk to him and find a way out. Don’t quit so easily.

He can be your SUN, as long as HE WANNA BE YOUR SUN, AND HE LIKES TO BE YOUR SUN. Otherwise, you are just needy and demanding instead of being loving. I think LZ's boyfriend doesn't really like to be her SUN. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888319@0)

Even the real sun will come and go. 12 hour can be night. You are expecting the sun in the sky 24x365? -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 (#3888358@0)

I don't expect a 24-hour sun, but I do hope women can give men a break, and be their own Sun from time to time, and FIND someone WHO WANTS TO BE THEIR SUN. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888381@0)

Ni Cai said "I am not a sun." Because we are human being. We can't be other people's sun all the time. We also can't expect the other people can be our sun all the time. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 {122} (#3889399@0)
Every one needs rest. So does the sun. And under what kind of situation you will say that is the sun for the other person?

You are NOT Friedrich Nietzsche, right? I doubt you wanna end up like him. A friendly reminder: Friedrich Nietzsche ended up crazy, and ended up in a mental hospital. -asker(amour); 2007-8-24 (#3890795@0)

恕我冒犯－－劝你别在这丢中国女性的人啦！ -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 {339} (#3888094@0)
人家说中国女人cheap,easy to get都是你这种人，别人对你带答不理，你却死皮赖脸的缠着人家，是不是连你自己都觉得委屈？在他大有先级的排行榜上，你是最低的？一个男人要真的爱一个女人会这样？醒醒吧！？

这种事情劝你打掉了牙往肚子里咽算了，还好意张扬？跨国恋？多浪漫啊？可我看到的是你的一肚子苦水！！说你贱一点都不过分。你知不知道你有多可怜！！！！

calm down, friend. you have a little exaggregated, if you do not mind I say so..... the LZ does not deserve words like "cheap,easy to get" and so on... she is in pain and needs help and warmth. -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-23 (#3888111@0)
无论中国人外国人都是人,难道对方是中国人就加以同情,是外国人就活该吗? YOU RACISM, 连对别人起码的尊重都没有,你也配用中文写帖子 -peeler(逛街的西瓜); 2007-8-23 (#3888142@0)

你说话好不讲道理，是她先冒犯我的，你怎么不说呢？而且语言及其难听。。。#3885931 -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 (#3888171@0)

主席说的好,人不犯我我不犯人,你不说人家贱在先,她能随便骂你? 你觉得家了几个:))))))) 楼主就能当是玩笑?你认识楼主吗? -peeler(逛街的西瓜); 2007-8-23 (#3888180@0)

贱和bitch根本是两个不同数量级的词，我只是用“太贱”没有用“下贱”。。。而且我的语气里并无恶意.......但bitch就截然不同了。。。我的理解不对吗？ -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 (#3888204@0)

理解对不对,depends on the receiver's feeling, right? obviously she was anger about your words, then she fought back. so basically, you started it. then you should be nice enough to bear with her anger then things would settle down between U2. -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-23 (#3888209@0)

呵呵，我到觉得你挺适合做个心理医生。。。。 -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 {14} (#3888223@0)
谢谢你。。。。

Glad you feel better.... -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-23 (#3888229@0)

嗯，公平的说，“贱”是个很重的骂女人的词，男人也许觉得无所谓。而且，楼主也说是挖个坑了。橘子这回你得闭嘴。 -major154(阿苏 - 人淡如菊); 2007-8-23 (#3888214@0)

好好好，，，一帮女人，没法跟你们辩理。。。我不说话了。。。 -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 {120} (#3888234@0)
帮我给lz带个话，这么下去，苦日子在后头呢？没有恶意，这是俺掏心窝的话。。。希望我说的是错的。

也谢谢你。。。啊苏。。。

说话太冲,被七嘴八舌了吧.:))) -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-23 (#3888274@0)
乖，～～～ -major154(阿苏 - 人淡如菊); 2007-8-23 (#3888767@0)

你的话让我想起曾认识的一个垃圾伊朗人,一次夸口说有几个中国女朋友,那洋洋得意的样子,让人恨不得给他一拳. -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-23 (#3888228@0)

咱不反对国女外恋,外嫁,只希望她们别沾那些垃圾. -8616121(长城外，万里花香); 2007-8-23 (#3888242@0)

Who said that? I never heard about that. If there is one person said that and you picked it up and repeat again and again, that means it is you that think like that. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-23 {320} (#3888348@0)
I think even some Chinese girls go to bed with white guy, that doesn't mean they are cheap. I guess Canadian girl go bed with guys much much more easily with guys. Even someone falls in love with some guys that you think is not that excellent show Chinese girls are cheap? Do you think every Chinese guy is "Jin pin"?

"Who said that?", well, if you are well-informed, you could have heard that million times.... and I do not think it is just a rumor or gossip.... not that simple.... -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-24 (#3889384@0)

Wow, amazing? You heard that million of times. Why? Why I never heard that? At least I never heard that from the people other than Chinease. Why? -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 (#3889402@0)

sometimes, you can only hear what you want to hear -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-24 (#3889409@0)

so that means those person just choose those comments because they would like to know their own woman is cheap? Then that is not the Chinese woman's problem. That is the people's who pick those words up problem. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 (#3889422@0)

I can't prove 橘子红了 was wrong. -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-24 (#3889438@0)

are you a guy or a lady? -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 (#3889452@0)

我是男是女并不重要。你没意识到吗: Rosegarden and 橘子红了 were fighting for their own souls. People jumped in and chose their sides automatically 。 -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-24 {126} (#3889509@0)
不过目前这还只是个体间的争斗，还没得出种群级别的胜负。橘子红了因实力不济或其他原因撤了。我想看到有多伦多男国移 alfa male出现。

实力不济的确是主要原因，想俺孤军奋战前后无援，改变战略也是无奈之举动。。。:))) -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-24 {338} (#3889684@0)
还有一个原因是，俺一个大男人和女人（们）斗口舌，实在没意思，自己也掉价。。。

换个角度想想，rosegarden爱那个人那么深，这种感觉真的不易，去体验一下飞蛾扑火的壮烈也何尝不可？设身处地的想，如果是我，如果有一个人让我爱的那么深，也许我会比她还执著。

“无怨无悔”是一种爱的境界，我是做不到，rosegarden也没做到，但我希望她将来能做到。。。。

well, I wouldn't agree this is amazing and I regard it as a shame to our fellas. No, people never said that in my presence but if you were at foreign forums you would know what I meant. -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-24 (#3889413@0)

That is only because those white guys also cheap because they play with the cheap Chinese girls. " wu yi lei ju". Who cares what those garbage white guys' comment for Chinese woman. -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 {287} (#3889436@0)
At least all the white guys I know from here, they really show respect to Chinese lady. So I don't agree with those forum's comments at all. What kind persons are they? " Piao ke" in China? Then they only meet Chinese prostitute. This career is the same everywhere in the world then.

actually i think there are more deeper things than that.there is issue of lack of confidence in race,culture,gender,and bad self-esteem.most of all,lack of faith and moral values.there are girls out there who have no ethical "bottom line". -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-24 (#3889569@0)

If that is the case, then it's not the woman's problem only. It is the all nation's problem. I think we are a little bit " chong yang mei wai" -cocojj(咖啡可可茶); 2007-8-24 {113} (#3889679@0)
As I know, Japan is worse than we do. But I just don't like the way man always said " Chinese woman is cheap".

你能否回答我一个问题吗？ -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-24 {216} (#3889723@0)
我看见很多和老外去餐馆（中，西都有）吃饭的女同胞，很多都是你们结账？AA的时候不多，但由老外结账的我还没有看到。

以此类比，如果你还记得的话，IBM的５０刀男，只是因为AA事件，遭到了几乎整ROLIA网的讨罚，你觉得这公平吗？

如果爱他,经他同意,可以尝试喧宾夺主--带他的孩子,当然还有他一起去玩. 高投入才会有高产出,丰厚的利润要有风险来垫底的. -647i(流浪的步行万里); 2007-8-23 (#3888325@0)

She can give it a try, even though getting his children's hearts doesn't necessarily mean she can get his heart of love. -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888393@0)

这里楼主和橘子红了的反应都是正常的，我完全理解。只有asker的话我一句都看不懂，她那么激动干哈？ -dlood(lord_of_blood); 2007-8-23 (#3888396@0)

:))))))))))))))) -asker(amour); 2007-8-23 (#3888414@0)
I can feel Asker's every single word with my heart. -rosegarden(spanish harlem); 2007-8-27 (#3895182@0)

Stupid, When a girl is in love.! That is all i got to say, You know I would prioralize the things around me.... -flametodust(Lovers to friends); 2007-8-23 {227} (#3888409@0)
I guess you just simply not get enough weight...You may be just his sex mate. It is good to have you around. But it is fine without you as well, simply because you are not the only source that he got... Sometime, truth hurts...
Get a life. really -flametodust(Lovers to friends); 2007-8-23 (#3888434@0)
你爱在幻想中 -wpk(Easy Come Easy Go); 2007-8-23 (#3888800@0)
"爱"字好象上个小学就可以认识,问题是很多人不知道它的意思. -eatnofat(我吃故我廋); 2007-8-23 (#3888877@0)
写给~~~~rosegarden(玫瑰园): -serenade123(橘子红了); 2007-8-23 {357} (#3888933@0)
刚才又看了一遍自己的回帖,觉得自己实在有些过分了...

后来,我一直在想:
如果真的像你所说的爱的那么的深,感觉那么的强烈,我真的希望你继续爱下去,别管别人说什么,别管结果怎么样,轰轰烈烈地爱一回...毕竟人的一生有这种感觉的时候不多...."爱我所爱,无怨无悔"也许这就是爱的真谛吧....

这里郑重的向你道个歉,别因为我的话不开心....
真心的希望你爱情...甜蜜蜜

橘子红了

好可爱的红橘子，哈哈。 -cube(又见炊烟); 2007-8-23 (#3888952@0)
呵呵, 橘子红了 :) -chu.ge(楚格, 海闊天空); 2007-8-23 (#3888955@0)
good guy. a guy who confesses and admits own wrongdoing. this deserves a fit of loud hand-clapping. -win(秋天的菠菜); 2007-8-24 (#3889391@0)
甜橘子！ -major154(阿苏 - 人淡如菊); 2007-8-24 (#3889974@0)
Forgive and forget. -rosegarden(spanish harlem); 2007-8-27 (#3895189@0)

@Ontario

Everyone is ordinary. I think even president of America. But when you love him, he is your sun.

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