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For a girl who got married at 32, it is a little bit late to start a happy family life, but still she should be blessed with all the best wishes. Yes, she married a man who is not rich, and 15 years older than her.

本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛But there is a saying that an old man will treasure his younger wife. And he will spoil her most likely or hopefully. When she came home with him, she found that he was not only poor, but gave up the hope to live a 'better' life as well. No new furnifure, no new slippers, no dream about to own a little sweet home in the future, no dream about having her own children, not mention romantic newly married life. She got nothing but a desperate old husband. A marriage means a promise for a better future life, and it should be a good start of it. If not, then why he wanted to be married? He must had very special reason which the people with common sense of marriage could not understand or expect.

Then let's look at the husband. He had a failed marriage before. His ex-wife doesn't look like having any good feeling to him. He was so mean to his second wife, no heart to provide her anything she wanted, even if it was just a promise or a word with hope. He was not in a good shape before he met her. But looked like he wanted her to share all his miserable even she could not be responsible for all his terible life happened before they met.

Let's look at the girl who met him before the tragedy. She is definitely a very nice girl. According to the record, he appreciated that too. It is hard to say that women in Canada only care about money. This is a very good evidence of the opposite.

Let's look at the man again. He definitely was not good at making a good living or let's say money. He was not good at handling marriage as well. He was not good at driving even he was a driver. But he was still lucky at meeting women. There were always nice girls willing to try a relationship with him without knowing that he could actually not giving back them anything, like self-owned little appartment or kids or even a pair of new slippers. No hope as well of course. With the exception of an immigration paper which he himself needed it anyway.

But no matter how, he became a hero after all. But why?更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 枫下佳缘 / 情爱悠悠 / For a girl who got married at 32, it is a little bit late to start a happy family life, but still she should be blessed with all the best wishes. Yes, she married a man who is not rich, and 15 years older than her.
    本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛But there is a saying that an old man will treasure his younger wife. And he will spoil her most likely or hopefully. When she came home with him, she found that he was not only poor, but gave up the hope to live a 'better' life as well. No new furnifure, no new slippers, no dream about to own a little sweet home in the future, no dream about having her own children, not mention romantic newly married life. She got nothing but a desperate old husband. A marriage means a promise for a better future life, and it should be a good start of it. If not, then why he wanted to be married? He must had very special reason which the people with common sense of marriage could not understand or expect.

    Then let's look at the husband. He had a failed marriage before. His ex-wife doesn't look like having any good feeling to him. He was so mean to his second wife, no heart to provide her anything she wanted, even if it was just a promise or a word with hope. He was not in a good shape before he met her. But looked like he wanted her to share all his miserable even she could not be responsible for all his terible life happened before they met.

    Let's look at the girl who met him before the tragedy. She is definitely a very nice girl. According to the record, he appreciated that too. It is hard to say that women in Canada only care about money. This is a very good evidence of the opposite.

    Let's look at the man again. He definitely was not good at making a good living or let's say money. He was not good at handling marriage as well. He was not good at driving even he was a driver. But he was still lucky at meeting women. There were always nice girls willing to try a relationship with him without knowing that he could actually not giving back them anything, like self-owned little appartment or kids or even a pair of new slippers. No hope as well of course. With the exception of an immigration paper which he himself needed it anyway.

    But no matter how, he became a hero after all. But why?更多精彩文章及讨论,请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
    • Well said, well argument. In our culture, we tend to forgive the deceased. Let him rest in peace.
    • 我们不讨论婚姻的对错。安钢也不是英雄。我们是在讨论安钢的抚恤金又谁来继承。 你回答我的问题,是或不是。你认为张女士应该独占这些钱嘛?
      • 不就是钱吗?安自己对于自己的遗嘱和收益人安排如何,有法律和政府的信托人来处理,用不着别人来说事。我们生活在加拿大,不是乡村的宗族社会。你真是ROLIA上封建社会的主要代表。
      • 我认为你应当先跟安钢的姐姐通话,而不是先跟张女士通话。因为以你目前的身份,张女士完全可以不理你。先从安钢的姐姐处了解些情况,看看他们的态度。如果他们支持你,你取得了他们的授权,以他们代理人的身份再跟张女士谈比较明正言顺也有地放矢。
        现在道听途说的东西太多了,安家真实的情况,他们现在真实的心态我们实在知道得太少。在还不了解这些因素的情况下就贸然替人家争取什么抚恤金,我们实在不清楚结果会不会是两头不落好。
        • This is a more practical suggestion - 先取得正当性。
          • 对的。其实我觉得安钢的姐姐不会把这个正当性给路谣。毕竟人家也不认识他,也不知道他办事能力。争取的空间小,争的钱少的话,还可能给这个热心的人。否则,人家可能会请律师,稳妥,保险。
            • 个人浅见: 会不会把这个正当性给路谣? 关键不完全在于认不认识。如果路遥的诚意张女士看得到, 路遥或许有代表性。 张女士很清楚该如何和律师周旋吗? Perhaps NOT.
              • 你弄拧了。路谣要代理的是安钢的姐姐。你说的张女士是安钢的前妻。路谣是要代表安钢的姐姐斗张女士。
        • 是的,路谣说了他会跟安钢姐姐联系,如果人家姐姐没意见,他就撤出来。这是对的。现在我能看到的隐患就是他跟人家姐姐说保险有80万那么多呀,而且全给了张女士了什么的,或者让人家有这种误解。所以现在要搞清楚,安钢是怎么分配保险的?
          安钢的家人是不是接到了通知?没有的话,去哪里找这个信息?

          然后就是你和路谣说的这步,跟姐姐谈,看姐姐对安钢这个分法有什么意见?对不是安钢分配的那部份,要了解加拿大法律可能的分法。
          • 正常人是不会对一个外人谈论这些细节的。一个人打电话,说很关心你的孩子,想知道你的遗嘱,你会随便告诉他/她吗?恐怕你只会觉得那人有病吧。所谓名不正言不顺,有些人在这里叫得再欢,也还是没用的。
            • 是的。所以估计路谣最后能做的很有限。但也不排除安家知道详情后真的觉得很不爽,又不值得请律师,那就任得路谣做了。路谣也得长个心眼儿,万一安家拿了保险,但是还是想整治一下张女士,因而有劳路谣了,就怕路谣还甍在鼓里呢。
              哎,算了,没个十拿九稳,都不要轻易论断。这是对活生生的人啊,论断错了等于害人。这就是医生和律师能拿高报酬的愿意。没拿那么高报酬的,特别要谨慎。
              • 不存在“任得路谣做”的事情出现,这里是法律社会,就算安家的婆家人自己没主意了,也不是路想走多远走多远的。如果他自己不先弄点法律知识武装自己,就算安家让他当代理,他也当不好。
      • Sorry, I don't care about money. I don't mind it will be decided by you :-)
    • 不要用各种观点、障眼法混淆大众视听。()本质问题就是:钱该谁拿?是安的80老母和10岁小儿,还是从一下飞机就摔冷脸,继而人间蒸发逼迫安钢离婚,认赌不服输,有保险赔偿又回来要钱的安“太太”?
      • 法制社会有法律和政府的信托人来处理。安自己要安排自己的遗嘱和收益人。如果他没有,他的家产估计是政府的信托人来处理。如有疑问,当事人协商,或申请法庭先冻结,然后再解决。
        这里是加拿大,不是中国的乡村社会。大家要做的是,请安的儿子和母亲出来向法庭提出遗产分割的异议,先冻结。然后再分。
        一句话,安自己没有安排好。就像他自己的人生一样,乱。
    • 只问一个问题:张女士应该独占这些钱吗??
      • Is this money so important? It is not a big amount after all.
        • It's not important to you and me. But I believe it is critical important to an 80-year-old mom and 10-year-old boy.
      • 应不应该,有法律决定,如果啥事情都是有所谓的“道德”来,或者由人来决定,什么时候用法律,什么时候用“道德”,那还要制定法律干什么?别忘了,这是21世纪,是在加拿大。
      • 加拿大没有死刑,是不是下次有个人按中国法律应该死刑的,结果在加拿大没有判死刑,你们打算组织一下,让那个人按照你们的“法”执行一下死刑?
      • 不应该,不过,1,法律或者保险条款可能从来冰就不可能100%受益。2,冰可能也从来就没准备着要100%受益。。所以根本问题是应该先假设人是好人,再看她怎莫作,。还是不管三七二十一,
        在还没有同时听到两方的辩解时(实际上,这是虚拟网络,就算听到也不能全信),就先假设她是坏人,然后又逼迫,又棒打的。可能顺便把自己个人在生活中的不顺也发泄发泄?
        • 是的,支持。
          • :-)
    • 不论婚姻对错,人性善恶, 只问一个问题:张女士应该独占这些钱吗?? 她2次认赌不服输:
      30多岁在亲姐姐的参谋下嫁人,却一下飞机就翻脸(据说是因为没有享受幸福的婚姻,婚姻还没开始就不幸福了?),结婚认赌不服输,此其一;玩失踪逼迫安钢离婚,有保险赔偿了又折回来要钱,不撒手,离婚认赌不服输,此其二。
    • 此论坛不是法庭,只能从良心和道德的角度问一个问题:钱该谁拿?是安的80老母和10岁小儿,还是2次认赌不服输,没有尽过婚姻的责任和义务,轻易拿到了移民身份,正当盛年,有完全生活能力的前“安太”?
      • 三方都有份.
      • 从良心的角度,一个人该死,我就可以四处散播不利于他的话,好让所有的人都恨他,最终达到有人可以出面,让那个去死吗?“道德”不是现如今社会做事情的唯一依据。如果只符合所谓你的“道德”,却不合法,那叫“法盲”
    • 看见 好多ID 都凭道德和良心回答:张女士-不应该-独占这些钱。相信公道自在人心。
      • 这一点上从来就没有过争议.
        • ya, like 雁影行洲 said so too........#1044070
      • "不应该-独占这些钱"不是某些人可以凭借不可靠的证据,肆意诬蔑造谣别人的理由。正如,"道德"不是干违法事情的理由一样。
    • 在网上虚拟世界,说话就是凭自己的道德和良心,诉诸法律的事情自然有人做。合法不合法由不得你我。
      • "合法不合法由不得你我",既然你可以不管法律,在网络世界随心所欲,那就怪不得别人,利用网络,也做不符合你的“道德良心”的事情了。
        • Yes, 在网上,你可以做不符合“道德良心”的事情,但不要口口声声打着“法律”的旗号说“合法”,搞得大家还以为你是律师,或者干脆就是法官呢!
          • 有点常识总比一些明显的法盲强。比那些没意识到自己是法盲的人就强太多了。比那些明知道自己是法盲,还要犟嘴的,就高不知多少倍。
    • are you her brother-in-law?
      nobody ever said Mr. An is a hero. She was not that innocent as you said either.
    • 没注意点进来,实在忍不住说几句....我以前看过这件事情的帖,发生了什么也知道点,不知道这里还在讨论....你这个帖把他说得那么差,好象那女的多无辜,我觉得一点都不MAKE SENSE.他以前就NOT IN GOOD SHAPE,也对生活不抱期望,做姐姐会介绍这样一个人给自己的亲妹妹吗?
      对绝大多数人来说,你家里有个大龄姐妹,你想帮助她早日成家,你会千里迢迢介绍个你不看好的人吗?当然,如果做姐姐的就策划妹妹把人家当跳板是另外一回事.
      嫁给一个有婚姻历史的男人,就得学会接收他的历史.他都快50了,国内有个孩子需要付抚养费,不想再要孩子太正常了.再退一步讲,来了才发现他的生活理念和她的完全不同,她想要买房子,他想要流浪,真心相爱的夫妻至少要努力去找到一个双方都能接受的SOLUTION吧?很难相信她是个REALLY NICE LADY.
      • 嗯,有点儿道理,不过楼主说的未必就代表张女士,张女士未必就象楼主那么想的,所以你砸中了张女士没有就不知道了。我看大家都甭打嘴仗了,打来打去也是大家打大家,跟当事人未必就有关系,反而把人家晒出来示众。