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Don't you guy recall the guy who jumped from Donmill bridge to Hw 401, who graduated from Qinghua, got two Ph.Ds, what was wrong with him?

shorthorn(梦想时分)

That man should not be blamed. Everyone knows man is not easy to find a decent job, he will feel humiliated if he is a professonal but have to do labor job here. But for woman, she can find a job for living, because bosses here tend to give less competitive opportunity to woman., and woman tends to be contended. So the woman, you should go back to join your husband and your kid, if you still love him, don't try to find out any excuse to explain why you "have to stay" here. Don't you recall the guy who jumped from Donmill bridge to Hw 401, who graduated from Qinghua, got two Ph.Ds, what was wrong with him?

(#3359271@0)
Last Updated: 2006-12-4
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枫下佳缘 / 情爱悠悠 / What is wrong between them? Wife is in Canada. Husband is in China. They have sperated since early last year. Her husband only called her from China twice during this period. -snowspring(orchid); 2006-12-1 {472} (#3354451@0)
The reason is that the expense of calling from China is too expensive. Wife took one year to get a diploma in a college and found a part-time job in her field. Unfortunately, the company does not want to hire a full-time worker because the limited workload. So wife has to look for a new one. When she calls her husband, her husband always asks her if she find a job or not . She feels more stressful for it. Wife asks me if there is any wrong with their relationship?

第一wrong, 夫妻不该分居 -misswindmill(生如夏花，死若秋叶); 2006-12-1 (#3354458@0)

yeah, why the husband doesn't like Canada because of the wife? why wife doesn't like China because of the husband? -eskimo(eskimo); 2006-12-2 (#3354698@0)

that's fucking obvious: the husband is a coward and looser! dump him!!! sooner than later! -looking4yh(Looking4u); 2006-12-1 (#3354469@0)

But their kid stays with her husband. Wife thinks it is also not easy for her husband to take care her kid. Although her mother is taking care her kid with her husband. -snowspring(orchid); 2006-12-1 (#3354508@0)

So, what? -looking4yh(Looking4u); 2006-12-1 (#3354515@0)

She do not know what she should do -snowspring(orchid); 2006-12-1 (#3354568@0)

She also does not know if the marriage for them is kind of meaningless. The life in Canada is not easy for her . -snowspring(orchid); 2006-12-1 {400} (#3354611@0)
She has to do everything by herself. She told me that she fainted in the bathroom and nobody helped her because nobody was inside of the room that she lives at that moment . In additon, she always tries to make herself more strong and independent.

She feel kind of risk in her marriage, but she does not want to meet her husband . Now her husband is a little bit strange for her. How can she do?

There's no such a thing in the world that would hundred percent satisfy you! -looking4yh(Looking4u); 2006-12-2 {220} (#3354756@0)
The hardship of life is that everyone has to make a choice now and then! Therefore, stay in marriage if the kid is the wife's most of all concern, or dump the shitty hub if quality of life is more important to the wife.

family separation is not uncommon in Canada, especially for first generation Chinese immigrants, due to the fact the both parties tend to have their own career. -niceandeasy(confused); 2006-12-2 {696} (#3354845@0)
Unlike western or other oriental families, most of Chinese are career-oriented, i.e they are more gearing to go out to work (regardless what kind of work) than stay home. This philosophy dominates Chinese community and it is invisible but controlling our behavior. I don't think anyone can walk away unless he/she was educated in differernt ways. So, my point is your friend can't get away from the reality and why not just sit back and relax, learn to enjoy each and everyday. I am sure she doesn't want to screw up her own life and make the rest of her life miserable. SO, cheer up and make the life worth living.

The above statement is based on my personal experience and hope that help!

Thanks. You are right. -snowspring(orchid); 2006-12-2 (#3355062@0)

could you tell how many times the wife have called her husband in China during this period (since early last year)? -david678(david); 2006-12-2 {60} (#3355013@0)
This gives a little information more about the relationship.

Normally once a week. She misses her kid. -snowspring(orchid); 2006-12-2 (#3355045@0)

All right. If her kid has been with her here, will the wife call her husband in China? -david678(david); 2006-12-2 {23} (#3355159@0)
and how often or never?

Apparently, it is so wrong, many chinese couples are in this kind of awkward satuation. -tuyiyi(依依); 2006-12-4 (#3358634@0)
Don't you guy recall the guy who jumped from Donmill bridge to Hw 401, who graduated from Qinghua, got two Ph.Ds, what was wrong with him? -shorthorn(梦想时分); 2006-12-4 {616} (#3359271@0)
That man should not be blamed. Everyone knows man is not easy to find a decent job, he will feel humiliated if he is a professonal but have to do labor job here. But for woman, she can find a job for living, because bosses here tend to give less competitive opportunity to woman., and woman tends to be contended. So the woman, you should go back to join your husband and your kid, if you still love him, don't try to find out any excuse to explain why you "have to stay" here. Don't you recall the guy who jumped from Donmill bridge to Hw 401, who graduated from Qinghua, got two Ph.Ds, what was wrong with him?
实在不能理解一个女人怎能离开自己的丈夫和孩子，只是为了所谓的事业，钻到牛角尖去了。我的观点的是：有孩子时，孩子已大，孩子在哪儿，父母就得在哪儿；如果孩子还小，倒可以回到中国。没孩子时，两人一方要妥协。 -qq234(QQ); 2006-12-5 (#3360528@0)
Time and distance account for all of the changes in her thinking and emotion. I simply don't believe any long-term long-distance relationship. -sunshine221(除了爱你，还能爱谁); 2006-12-5 (#3361152@0)
only twice? it's expensive to call you from china? It's very cheap! -cw2000(起伏); 2006-12-18 (#3385041@0)
大惊小怪的。我都分居快2年了。 -6yue(6月); 2006-12-19 {268} (#3385461@0)
我每周打电话。所以我老婆就从来不给我电话，连电子邮件都没有，从来没有。也不上什么msn.虽然她在家有宽带，单位电脑也上网。
觉得国内就是忙。理解万岁吧！
自己在这边寂寞，所以这个打电话就是很重要的调节。再加上这边的电话费比国内便宜。所以这边往中国打电话多得多是完全正常的。

@Ontario

Don't you guy recall the guy who jumped from Donmill bridge to Hw 401, who graduated from Qinghua, got two Ph.Ds, what was wrong with him?

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